You know, the problem with blogging is you can do it in SO many different places. MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, and Wikis...it gets all too confusing! So I have updated some of those sites but this one I haven't given proper attention to!
I was watching "He's Just Not That Into You" the other night and I laugh at the scene where Drew Barrymore's character talks about all the ways people can be contacted now a days. And how sometimes you wish it could all go back to the ONE land line, that held ONE little tape, and that was where people would always reach you. I find it funny how many websites I have obtained over the years to keep in contact with all the people I have met in my life. You've got MySpace for the facebook haters, Facebook for the MySpace haters, Xanga for those who refuse to realize there is more to life then a pre-teen blog site, Blogspot which gives you a more mature looking blog, Twitter for people who just need a brief snipet of what you have been up to. And so on. I feel like I should delete all of these ways to contact me and see who actually calls the cell phone! haha. I dont know if I could ever do that though!
Well. Im looking for a job and the market is terrible. The once a week breakdowns on never finding a job have ceased for awhile. I think once I put it in perspective that I am doing all I can and what happen will happen, I will be able to be a stronger person in the job hunt. I tend to take it so emotionally. I gotta stop doing that!
Well. Thats a quick update...
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Friday, February 15, 2008
NIU....
Yesterday I watched as Dekalb, IL became a national headline. Who is sick enough to walk into a classroom of innocent people and just start blowing them away? I couldnt believe it...
This hit close to home seeing as that I know people who go to NIU, and I go to a state school in the same state....this could have been EIU. This could have been ISU. WIU. SIU. this is such a too close to home situation.
In my health class we have been talking about school violence...the motives students have, things that alter their mindsets things like that...I just dont get it. It makes me so sick...
To all of those at NIU, stay strong, believe that as a campus you CAN and WILL get through this. To the families, victims and witnesses: may you rely on God to guide you. My deepest prayers and thoughts go out to each and everyone of you.
This hit close to home seeing as that I know people who go to NIU, and I go to a state school in the same state....this could have been EIU. This could have been ISU. WIU. SIU. this is such a too close to home situation.
In my health class we have been talking about school violence...the motives students have, things that alter their mindsets things like that...I just dont get it. It makes me so sick...
To all of those at NIU, stay strong, believe that as a campus you CAN and WILL get through this. To the families, victims and witnesses: may you rely on God to guide you. My deepest prayers and thoughts go out to each and everyone of you.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
The End of 2007
I cant even begin to explain the amount of love I have held for 2007. It hasn't always been the easiest and the fact of the matter is, 3 absolutely amazing months made this year the best ever.
I know I have talked about the amount of gratitude I have for my friends I made this summer at State Farm, but I honestly believe that meeting them has completely changed my outlook on life. Selected few, and they know who they are, have helped me realize the true self worth I have, and that I shouldn't doubt myself so much. The strength I have I owe to the amount of self discovery I have experienced since June. I have been reading a book called Captivating (as suggested to me by Jenna!!) and with every page I realized the problems I have experienced for three years, are normal. and that I am a wounded woman, but my wounds need not be healed by men, or men that I feel that will fix them, they are wounds that need to be healed by God. Honestly, I have been looking for a man to tell me the things I want to hear, not what I needed to hear. This has now lifted a cloud I had once experienced. I know what I want, and I am in no rush to get it. If it needs to be rushed, then its not worth it. Yes, many of you know what I am going through right now in this "relationship" department, but to me, its worth it, by dating guys I am not interested in seems like a waste of time, Im waiting. Thats that.
Next year, life is going to be changed even more. In May, I will graduated from Eastern Illinois University with a B.S. in Elementary Education, and in August, I will begin student teaching. When did I become old enough to graduate college... this is ridiculous! But I have great friends at home so I am extremely excited to be home right now! :)
I know I have talked about the amount of gratitude I have for my friends I made this summer at State Farm, but I honestly believe that meeting them has completely changed my outlook on life. Selected few, and they know who they are, have helped me realize the true self worth I have, and that I shouldn't doubt myself so much. The strength I have I owe to the amount of self discovery I have experienced since June. I have been reading a book called Captivating (as suggested to me by Jenna!!) and with every page I realized the problems I have experienced for three years, are normal. and that I am a wounded woman, but my wounds need not be healed by men, or men that I feel that will fix them, they are wounds that need to be healed by God. Honestly, I have been looking for a man to tell me the things I want to hear, not what I needed to hear. This has now lifted a cloud I had once experienced. I know what I want, and I am in no rush to get it. If it needs to be rushed, then its not worth it. Yes, many of you know what I am going through right now in this "relationship" department, but to me, its worth it, by dating guys I am not interested in seems like a waste of time, Im waiting. Thats that.
Next year, life is going to be changed even more. In May, I will graduated from Eastern Illinois University with a B.S. in Elementary Education, and in August, I will begin student teaching. When did I become old enough to graduate college... this is ridiculous! But I have great friends at home so I am extremely excited to be home right now! :)
Thursday, October 11, 2007
A Whole New Out Look
I havent written in this in so long! Its because time has flown by and I really didnt have a chance, but now Im waiting for my class to start so I figured I would write a bit now!
So From the last time I posted to the end of the summer. What can I say? If you werent there for it, its so hard to explain what it was like. Ill do my best. I really wish things could have gone differently this summer, especially at the beginning, Canada was great, but I went through so much, and I felt so alone. But I couldnt have been more wrong. There are so many people in my life now after this summer that make me feel whole. And its so cliche to say, but I dont care, its the truth; I found my friends for life. The last week of the summer, was so hard for me, everything we did, it was the last time. I thought "im never going to see these people, whom I have become so close to, until next summer." I felt so upset, I remember driving down Route 9, passing Buffalo Wild Wings, and crying. It was all moving away from me, so fast, I felt like I was drowning. completely being pulling under. I knew school wasnt going to be the same. But. I get half way there and my text messages start rolling in, from everyone in the rearview mirror, wondering if I made it there okay, how I was doing. It so so surreal, I was gone, but they were with me. Granted School has been such an emotional rollercoster but I go home way more than I used to because, I now have something to come home to, my best friends, and I couldnt have asked for a greater group of friends then the ones I have. If you are reading this, know that I love you all and I couldnt have made it through this summer without you, or this semester so far.
Like I said school has been an emotional rollercoster, but it has flown by...ITS MIDTERM!! Holy cow! I cant believe it, Im a fourth done with my senior year. I can hardly comprehend this. I got my practicum assignment, and Im working in a 5th grade classroom. my first experience with them...I was scared, I didnt know what to think or how to act, its an inclusion classroom, uhm....WHAT? Im so paranoid that my lessons wont be good enough...this is truely a test. But. I know I can do it after today. I got to sit and do readers theatre with some of them earlier today, and I got to know a couple of them. They are gonna be fun, out of control at times, but fun. Other than that Im teaching 3rd grade social studies once a week with a partner, and we teach four students about an Illinois Hero, and ours is Bonnie Blair, the Olympic speed skater, and ITS A BLAST! 3rd grade...what an age. Its so much fun, stressful but fun! I wish I could be in the classroom all the time rather than being in my classes...which I have been having issues with all semester..buts its okay. because...Im getting all A's at midterm...first time ever... Im shocked! Im working really hard, and it helps me from missing home a lot.
My sister is going to have her baby on Tuesday next week, I cant wait to see my new nephew! Its going to be another miracle.
Other than that the only thing I have left to say is, I found God, more than I have in a while. I found out that Her is the reason I do what I do!! :)
Please leave comments, or whatever... May God bless you!!
So From the last time I posted to the end of the summer. What can I say? If you werent there for it, its so hard to explain what it was like. Ill do my best. I really wish things could have gone differently this summer, especially at the beginning, Canada was great, but I went through so much, and I felt so alone. But I couldnt have been more wrong. There are so many people in my life now after this summer that make me feel whole. And its so cliche to say, but I dont care, its the truth; I found my friends for life. The last week of the summer, was so hard for me, everything we did, it was the last time. I thought "im never going to see these people, whom I have become so close to, until next summer." I felt so upset, I remember driving down Route 9, passing Buffalo Wild Wings, and crying. It was all moving away from me, so fast, I felt like I was drowning. completely being pulling under. I knew school wasnt going to be the same. But. I get half way there and my text messages start rolling in, from everyone in the rearview mirror, wondering if I made it there okay, how I was doing. It so so surreal, I was gone, but they were with me. Granted School has been such an emotional rollercoster but I go home way more than I used to because, I now have something to come home to, my best friends, and I couldnt have asked for a greater group of friends then the ones I have. If you are reading this, know that I love you all and I couldnt have made it through this summer without you, or this semester so far.
Like I said school has been an emotional rollercoster, but it has flown by...ITS MIDTERM!! Holy cow! I cant believe it, Im a fourth done with my senior year. I can hardly comprehend this. I got my practicum assignment, and Im working in a 5th grade classroom. my first experience with them...I was scared, I didnt know what to think or how to act, its an inclusion classroom, uhm....WHAT? Im so paranoid that my lessons wont be good enough...this is truely a test. But. I know I can do it after today. I got to sit and do readers theatre with some of them earlier today, and I got to know a couple of them. They are gonna be fun, out of control at times, but fun. Other than that Im teaching 3rd grade social studies once a week with a partner, and we teach four students about an Illinois Hero, and ours is Bonnie Blair, the Olympic speed skater, and ITS A BLAST! 3rd grade...what an age. Its so much fun, stressful but fun! I wish I could be in the classroom all the time rather than being in my classes...which I have been having issues with all semester..buts its okay. because...Im getting all A's at midterm...first time ever... Im shocked! Im working really hard, and it helps me from missing home a lot.
My sister is going to have her baby on Tuesday next week, I cant wait to see my new nephew! Its going to be another miracle.
Other than that the only thing I have left to say is, I found God, more than I have in a while. I found out that Her is the reason I do what I do!! :)
Please leave comments, or whatever... May God bless you!!
Monday, July 9, 2007
I cant believe how fast this summer has GONE! But Im glad that its been one of the best summers I have ever had. Usually the problem with summer is I never have any of my friends from home...actually here. I was super scared to start at State Farm this summer, and I was pretty sure that I was going to go to Charleston every weekend because I had no one here. BUT. I have met some of the most incredible people this summer. I am extremely blessed. This job is not only amazing that I work with kids all day, everyday, but its amazing because I get to work with my friends all day! I couldnt believe how scared I was.
Another thing was this summer started off with study abroad which was amazing then I had like 3 weeks of bad. Then I started State Farm...and then more bad. But let me tell you, the best thing that happened to me this summer, was being able to let go of someone. I feel that being completely single this summer has been awesome. No telling someone where Im going, or calling them or anything like that. It took me about two weeks, but Im glad I can accept it now. As for dating and what not....Im okay with it now. Im not exactly looking but I do have my eye on someone, I just stink at making moves!!! But its okay, I got time until the summer is over.
Im heading to EIU tomorrow! I get to see Kayla, Kerry, Evan, Alan, Dallas and hopefully Hilary!! Im so sad. Hilary is leaving for D.C in August... I cant believe one of my best friends is leaving me. I am just really upset about it, I cant imagine EIU without her... its gonna be rough. But Im excited to see some of my amazing friends and to clean up the Apartment so I can move out in two weeks!
I turn 21 on Sunday. Im partying it up on saturday night! EVERYONE IS INVITED TO COME TO CELEBRATE IT WITH ME!!! At least to pre-game. Bars if you are of age of course!!
Another thing was this summer started off with study abroad which was amazing then I had like 3 weeks of bad. Then I started State Farm...and then more bad. But let me tell you, the best thing that happened to me this summer, was being able to let go of someone. I feel that being completely single this summer has been awesome. No telling someone where Im going, or calling them or anything like that. It took me about two weeks, but Im glad I can accept it now. As for dating and what not....Im okay with it now. Im not exactly looking but I do have my eye on someone, I just stink at making moves!!! But its okay, I got time until the summer is over.
Im heading to EIU tomorrow! I get to see Kayla, Kerry, Evan, Alan, Dallas and hopefully Hilary!! Im so sad. Hilary is leaving for D.C in August... I cant believe one of my best friends is leaving me. I am just really upset about it, I cant imagine EIU without her... its gonna be rough. But Im excited to see some of my amazing friends and to clean up the Apartment so I can move out in two weeks!
I turn 21 on Sunday. Im partying it up on saturday night! EVERYONE IS INVITED TO COME TO CELEBRATE IT WITH ME!!! At least to pre-game. Bars if you are of age of course!!
Monday, June 25, 2007
Homework+Summer=NO FUN!
So I have been staring at my Toronto homework for a while now. I really need to get started on that stuff! I should take it to work and do it during my break time. I just am not motivated to do it!!! Even though Toronto was O-MAZING! I want to go back next year. But the money isnt looking like it will be there :(. SAD SONGS!
Anyways. I love Day Camp! I put up new pictures on Facebook and so you should check them out...oh and...if you dont have facebook YOU SHOULD GET ONE! and be my friend! haha!
So I have decided that the week I am off from camp Im gonna go down to charleston for a few days to hang out with Michelle before she leaves me to go be a 5th grade teacher in North Carolina! :( and then hang out with Hilary, Evan, Alan, Dallas, Megan, Stacy, Kerry and KAYLALA! I miss all my friends from Eastern...this is a sad situation!!
Anyways! I need to stop procrastinating!! I need to get my homework done!!!! :)
Anyways. I love Day Camp! I put up new pictures on Facebook and so you should check them out...oh and...if you dont have facebook YOU SHOULD GET ONE! and be my friend! haha!
So I have decided that the week I am off from camp Im gonna go down to charleston for a few days to hang out with Michelle before she leaves me to go be a 5th grade teacher in North Carolina! :( and then hang out with Hilary, Evan, Alan, Dallas, Megan, Stacy, Kerry and KAYLALA! I miss all my friends from Eastern...this is a sad situation!!
Anyways! I need to stop procrastinating!! I need to get my homework done!!!! :)
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Summer Has Begun!
So many of you know this summer has been pretty rough on me.
I went to Canada in the beginning of May which was one of the most rewarding experiences EVER! I would totally do it again in a heart beat! But when I got back, one of my brothers friends and teammate from high school died. It hit hard. I couldnt believe it...its so hard to think that someone with so much promise and so much going for him... is gone. Now that is been over a month, I can realize that it was in God's plan for him, and he is watching over all of us and that has helped knowing that it was in the plan. I dont know what I would have done if something like that happened to my brothers or sisters...it would be difficult. I pray for his family everyday, that they have the strength to get through the day.
After that I went through a difficult time with my personal life. Someone I cared about alot basically told me it wasnt there for him anymore, nor would it ever be. That happened during my training for State Farm Day Camp, I felt so alone, but Brittany, Jenna, Steven and Kerry really helped me get through that. They are abosolutely amazing people. Im still attempting to talk to him to see if we could continue on as friends...but no response has been given back to me. so....I tried again tonight sending a "hey!" over aim...no response...oh well... Im just trying to push through.
My summer job is absolutely amazing. I cannot express that enough! I work at State Farm Day camp...and right when I thought " I have no friends in Bloomington anymore, this summer is going to be terrible" I met some of the coolest people in this town! I have had a blast hanging out with them all and to tell you the truth...its helped me move on from this whole "break up" I have been going through. When Im hanging out with my friends from work. its so fun and laid back I feel like I can be myself, dont have to prove myself to anyone, and can just forget about all that bad that has happened in the last month. This job is a true blessing and I take none of it for granted...
In family news! Missy is having a baby boy! 18 weeks until he is here!! Bradyn Lee!!! :) My mom and I have bought SO many clothes for him!! she has enough for the first nine months of his life!! I CANNOT WAIT! Another little baby!! Also, my cousin Mike is getting married in August on the 11th! so any one want to be my date?! I had one... but it fell through!!! Id love you forever if you go! :)
This weekend has been filled with laying around, working at The Childrens Place, shopping, and of course more laying around! Im going up north tomorrow to see my Grandma, and then coming back to see "Annie Get Your Gun" Tomorrow night at Miller Park! Im still REALLY bummed about not doing a show, but next summer!! :)
Anyways... Im off!!
FYI: IM 21 IN 21 DAYS! :) THREE WEEKS FROM NOW! :) ITS ON!!! :)
I went to Canada in the beginning of May which was one of the most rewarding experiences EVER! I would totally do it again in a heart beat! But when I got back, one of my brothers friends and teammate from high school died. It hit hard. I couldnt believe it...its so hard to think that someone with so much promise and so much going for him... is gone. Now that is been over a month, I can realize that it was in God's plan for him, and he is watching over all of us and that has helped knowing that it was in the plan. I dont know what I would have done if something like that happened to my brothers or sisters...it would be difficult. I pray for his family everyday, that they have the strength to get through the day.
After that I went through a difficult time with my personal life. Someone I cared about alot basically told me it wasnt there for him anymore, nor would it ever be. That happened during my training for State Farm Day Camp, I felt so alone, but Brittany, Jenna, Steven and Kerry really helped me get through that. They are abosolutely amazing people. Im still attempting to talk to him to see if we could continue on as friends...but no response has been given back to me. so....I tried again tonight sending a "hey!" over aim...no response...oh well... Im just trying to push through.
My summer job is absolutely amazing. I cannot express that enough! I work at State Farm Day camp...and right when I thought " I have no friends in Bloomington anymore, this summer is going to be terrible" I met some of the coolest people in this town! I have had a blast hanging out with them all and to tell you the truth...its helped me move on from this whole "break up" I have been going through. When Im hanging out with my friends from work. its so fun and laid back I feel like I can be myself, dont have to prove myself to anyone, and can just forget about all that bad that has happened in the last month. This job is a true blessing and I take none of it for granted...
In family news! Missy is having a baby boy! 18 weeks until he is here!! Bradyn Lee!!! :) My mom and I have bought SO many clothes for him!! she has enough for the first nine months of his life!! I CANNOT WAIT! Another little baby!! Also, my cousin Mike is getting married in August on the 11th! so any one want to be my date?! I had one... but it fell through!!! Id love you forever if you go! :)
This weekend has been filled with laying around, working at The Childrens Place, shopping, and of course more laying around! Im going up north tomorrow to see my Grandma, and then coming back to see "Annie Get Your Gun" Tomorrow night at Miller Park! Im still REALLY bummed about not doing a show, but next summer!! :)
Anyways... Im off!!
FYI: IM 21 IN 21 DAYS! :) THREE WEEKS FROM NOW! :) ITS ON!!! :)
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